Yeah, this is a legit problem with pure conjuration, and it gets worse the better your summons are. You're not crazy for feeling like you're just... watching.
The perk tree doesn't really solve this on its own because Conjuration's whole design is "summon strong thing, thing kills stuff." The perks that boost your summons (Mystic Binding, Necromage if you're a vampire, etc.) just make the problem worse. There's no perk that says "summon weaker but let me participate more."
Your actual options:
Hybrid into Destruction - this is probably the path I'd take. Frost spells especially synergize with summons (enemies are staggered/slowed, summons finish them). You don't need to go heavy, just enough Destruction perks to make spellcasting feel active. Impact (the perk that staggers with spells) is stupid good for this. You're not really leaving Conjuration, just... giving yourself something to do while your atronach is busy.
Melee + summons - less fun imo, but it works. Summon something, wade in, actually swing a weapon. Feels more like you're commanding rather than spectating. Requires some investment in weapon skills though.
Respec and use weaker summons deliberately - you could skip the high-tier conjuration perks and just summon the mid-tier stuff. Yeah, it's self-imposed difficulty, but some people dig that.
If you're on PC and open to mods, there are Conjuration rebalance mods that make summons scale with enemy level better so they don't trivialize everything at level 22. That said, you're probably better off just accepting that Conjuration is a "let your stuff do the work" school and either hybrid it or restart with a different concept. Pure Conjuration solo is kind of a trap build.
